Although we may be physically present in a given situation, it is possible to do many things in a “mindless” state. For instance, how many times have you driven home on autopilot, feeling like you have little recollection of the actual journey home? Or responded to a loved one impatiently or in haste, without putting much thought into the words we use? It happens to everyone, and understandably so. Most of us are busy, and constantly feeling the demands of day-to-day life. It’s easy for our mind to wander, following threads into the past or focusing on the future, causing us to miss what might be right in front of us. Luckily, there is a way to reduce our tendency to function on autopilot – it’s called mindfulness.
The idea of mindfulness has become increasingly popular in the Western world – it’s difficult to find someone who’s never heard of it. For many, the word “mindfulness” conjures up images of serene, happy people sitting cross-legged on a yoga mat. However, the truth is that mindfulness in practice can often be messy, frustrating, and even overwhelming – especially at the beginning of our journey with it. When we slow down and hone in on our moment by moment experience, it’s possibly to uncover sensations or experiences we would rather not notice. It has happened to me on a number of occasions. On the other hand, mindfulness is wonderful in that it can be practiced anywhere, by anyone, and has demonstrated benefits in a variety of areas, including stress management, reducing anxiety and helping us cope with pain, to name a few (Brown & Ryan, 2003). Regular mindfulness practice has also been associated with positive changes in brain and immune system functioning (Davidson, Kabat-Zinn, Schumacher, Rosenkranz, Muller, Santorelli, Urbanowski, Harrington, Bonus & Sheridan, 2003).
But what exactly is mindfulness? Essentially, it is a state of conscious awareness. Mindfulness is the ability to be fully present with our thoughts, emotions and sensations as they arise while not being reactive to them. Jon Kabat-Zinn defines mindfulness as “paying attention in a particular way: on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally.”
In graduate school, I took a course on mindfulness in which I got into the habit of doing daily meditations. This morning as I sat on my cushion, I noticed tension in my shoulders as I thought about all I had to do today, but I also noticed excitement about what this day would bring. I noticed a lot of emotions associated with expectations I needed to meet, but also fears about failing to meet those expectations I’ve set for myself. Our emerging thoughts and feelings have a natural ebb and flow to them, some pleasant, some less so, but all equally a part of the web of experience.
In practice, mindfulness can take on many forms. For instance, it can refer to the use of guided meditations that instruct you to focus on your breath or some sort of visual, or it could involve music that allows you to clear your mind for a few minutes. Some people find that they prefer to practice silent mindfulness meditation. Others practice mindfulness during daily activities – such as focusing on the thoughts and sensations that arise for you while you do a routine task, like eating, washing the dishes, or walking the dog. There isn’t a “right” way to be mindful. In other words, there isn’t some ultimate “goal” we are trying to achieve or a destination we are heading toward – mindfulness is more about cultivating a deeper awareness and presence in our lives. It allows us to become friends with our inner worlds.
So, mindfulness isn’t about changing our experience itself, but rather to change the relationship we have with our experience. Regardless of whether certain thoughts or feelings never “go away” or change, if we can be present with those experiences with compassion and acceptance, the effect they have on us will shift and they will no longer grip us.
If you or someone you know is interested in learning more about mindfulness and its applications to everyday life, contact us to learn more about our mindfulness services.
Jessica Escobar, LMFT
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References for articles mentioned above:
1. Brown, K.W. and Ryan, R.M. (2003). The Benefits of Being Present: Mindfulness and its Role in Psychological Well-being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(4), 822-848.
2. Davidson, R.J., Kabat-Zinn, J., Schumacher, J., Rosenkranz, M., Muller, D., Santorelli, SF., Urbanowski, F., Harrington, A., Bonus, K. and Sheridan, J.F. (2003). Alterations in Brain and Immune Function Produced by Mindfulness Meditation. Psychosomatic Medicine, 65, 564-570.